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Two teens get spanked, MF/ff, March 1964

Dear Editor,

I was most interested to read the letter in your November issue from the woman who cast a dissenting vote on the subject of spanking teenage daughters.

I don’t doubt that corporal punishment, if carried to extremes, can cause possible psychiatric damage to children. But my question is this — how can you hope to control healthy, spirited youngsters if you don’t occasionally resort to the oldest form of domestic discipline?

Let me cite my own case. I am the mother of two high school age daughters. Both are pretty, popular and full of fun. But, frankly, they are both still children in many ways. My husband and I are aware of the temptations they face. There have been altogether too many instances in our neighborhood where girls have gotten into trouble simply because they were allowed to run wild. My husband and I long ago decided that this wasn’t going to happen to our children.

When the girls were younger I handled all matters of discipline easily enough. Five or six swift swats on the seat of the pants were generally enough to put a naughty girl on an even keel. But by the time they reached their teens this became a physical impossibility. I was no longer strong enough to do the job, and both girls resisted me freely, which made the situation worse than ever. I felt they were losing all respect for me, and for my husband because he allowed the situation to go on.

The older girl, who was at the time I am discussing fifteen, was especially a problem. She was extremely popular with boys and I think this popularity went to her head. Both her manners and her school work began to suffer. Furthermore, she was setting an example for her younger sister that I didn’t like.

We tried a number of forms of punishment — withdrawal of allowance, halting of dating, etc, but found no improvement at all. Finally, my husband drew the line. He called both girls together and told them that they were either going to improve their behavior or they could expect some thorough spankings.

I don’t think the girls believed him. My husband is a large, strong man but generally very gentle and courteous.

Three nights later our older daughter attended a school dance with a boy who is old enough to drive a car. Before they left, my husband explained that he expected Angela back no later than 11:30. She looked at her father a little oddly and said that they would “try.”

By midnight she still wasn’t home and my husband was both worried and very angry. He stormed downstairs to the rumpus room and returned carrying a ping pong paddle which he laid on the arm of his easy chair.

It was well after 12:30 that we finally heard the car pull up in the driveway. Without a word, my husband rushed out of the house and soon returned dragging a very flustered young lady behind him. I don’t think that she had ever imagined that her father would ever carry out his threat. But in a moment, party dress, high heels and all, she found herself stretched out, face down, across his knees.

What followed was certainly a far more thorough spanking than that young lady had ever experienced. My husband delivered four or five good swats with the paddle which set her to yelling and kicking. The more she kicked, the angrier he got, and in a moment he pulled up her skirt and really got to the seat of the matter. There was no more kicking after that and when I led the sobbing girl to bed she was a thoroughly chastised young lady.

While we don’t have a mantle piece in our home, my daughter could certainly have used one that day. She was certainly in no hurry to sit down on anything. But on the whole, I don’t think that the pain she experienced was comparable to the embarrassment.

Since then there have been other spankings in our house — not many, but enough to do the job. My younger daughter received a very thorough paddling for being sent home from school because she was smoking a cigarette.

What has been the effect on the girls? Marvelous. Their behavior has improved immensely they are more courteous and, I think, happier. Not, of course, that they have developed into angels. But now they think twice before they misbehave, because they know the paddle is hanging right behind the pantry door and they know that their father will apply it whenever and wherever necessary.

Actually, I think they prefer a paddling to the nagging kind of punishments that go on for days or weeks afterward. A spanking is something that’s over with soon and there are no lingering effects, except for a temporary soreness.

While corporal punishment may not be the answer in every home, it has done wonders in ours.

Mrs. A. E. New York